I have managed to get the mods to make it work as I wish for MSFS (PC). It is just a shame that a mod is required for something that ruins the immersion so much in vr.
In my current setup, I now have no horrid blue highlight, no weird eye pointing at the obvious. If I want to use tooltips I hold the left Alt key. I can then see the tooltip for whatever my mouse is hovering over, not in some horrendous out of place large font.
I am massively dissapointed this is not an option by default. It is clear that the current system is aimed at the Xbox version of the game. I just find it bizzar that instead of giving us useful options, this is what we get.